Being a mother is perhaps the most beautiful, rewarding, and terrifying experience of a woman’s life. With the birth of a child, true love and joy are realized. But along with these new and lovely emotions comes an unexpected weight of responsibility. From the day they are born, a mother’s every action is for the benefit and well-being of their children, truly never-ending love in action. And for a mom watching her most prized possession struggle with addiction, no matter if they are a minor or an adult, this experience can be one of the most painful a mother can endure. Carrying the heavy burden of worry, guilt, and an aching heart, many moms in Salt Lake City and across the U.S. with children battling addiction are searching for guidance on how they can best help their child.
Addiction is a highly complex disease. But through compassion, patience, and guidance, a mother’s love can make a meaningful difference, supporting their child’s recovery and sobriety. This guide will help moms understand the complexity of addiction, how to recognize the signs for early intervention, tips on how to support their child (minor or adult), and guidance on how to care for themselves along the way. First, let’s look at what every mom should know to better understand addiction as a disease and not a choice.
Understanding Addiction: What Every Mom Should Know
Many moms have the common experience of feeling guilty for their children’s problems. Addiction has a stigma associated with it, leading to the perception that those who have addictions are bad people who make bad choices. The reality is, addiction is a disease process in the brain, affecting how a person behaves, thinks, and feels. Addiction can affect anyone from every walk of life. Substance abuse holds the brain’s reward system hostage, demanding more of whatever substance it is, whether a person wants it or not. In Utah, where opioid, fentanyl, heroin, and methamphetamine addiction are on the rise, understanding this disease is critical for loving mothers who want to help their child out of the pit of addiction.
As a mom, it is so important to know that addiction is not a sign of poor parenting or a flaw in the character of your child. Addictions (of all kinds) are a disease that usually requires professional treatment, support, and time. For moms, learning about addiction enables them to approach their child with compassion and love rather than judgment. Knowing and understanding addiction as a medical condition is the first step toward healing. Moms who view their child’s addiction as an illness rather than a failing of the child or her parenting can avoid the trap of the blame and shame game and more effectively help their child heal. Sometimes, the hardest thing for a mom to do is admit that their child has a problem. Let’s take a look at how moms can spot the signs of addiction in their children.
Recognizing the Signs of Addiction in Your Child
Early recognition of an addiction can contribute significantly to the overall success of an individual’s recovery. The adolescent brain, which is still developing, makes them even more vulnerable to developing long-term substance dependence. The earlier a mom can recognize a problem with addiction, the sooner she can intervene. Early intervention can prevent the lasting impacts substances have on a person’s physical, emotional, and social well-being, increasing the chances for a successful recovery. Look for the following signs of addiction, which can vary by age, but all signal the need for loving action:
- Changes in behavior
- Mood swings
- Secrecy
- Changes in sleeping and eating habits
- Lack of interest in activities once enjoyed
- Increased anger or aggressiveness
- Decreased academic performance or missed school
- Missing work or losing employment
- Withdrawing from family
- Financial problems
- Physical signs include bloodshot eyes, changes in weight, poor hygiene, and frequent sickness.
For teens, moms can watch for declining grades or unexplained absences at school, while those with adult children should pay more attention to patterns like job loss or damaged relationships. Moms who notice these signs in their child should act fast, but calmly and lovingly. Starting a conversation at an appropriate time, in a calm and caring way, moms should be careful not to make accusations, judgments, or express anger. Instead, they can express love and concern by saying, “ I feel like you have not been yourself lately. I love you, and I am worried. Can we talk?”
For moms who aren’t sure how to navigate this conversation or need professional guidance, they can contact a Salt Lake City drug rehabilitation center for additional help and resources. Having professional guidance before intervening can also help streamline the process of getting the child into an addiction recovery program. Once treatment has begun, moms may be left wondering, “What now?” Keep reading and discover how moms across the country can support their child through recovery.
Supporting a Child in Addiction Recovery
A mother’s role in her child’s life is decisive. A mom is the caretaker, the nurturer, the biggest fan. However, as children grow, the role their moms play in their lives changes, too. Below, we look at how moms can support both a minor child and an adult child, highlighting the benefits of a professional drug rehabilitation center and your loving involvement.
- Supporting a Minor Child (Under 18): As a parent of a child under the age of 18, mothers have legal authority and a significant amount of influence over the child. Here’s how moms can help their minor children begin the recovery process:
- First, connect with a drug rehabilitation center that has youth-focused programs. Other professionals who may be able to support moms in their pursuit to save their child include school counselors, pediatricians, or professional counselors who specialize in adolescent addiction. No matter what, early intervention is critical for preventing long-term effects and struggles.
- Be involved with your child’s recovery process. Participate in family therapy, meetings, and holistic activities when invited. Staying involved and present in a child’s recovery reinforces a parent’s love and commitment to the child’s well-being.
- Set clear, healthy boundaries. This means creating rules that promote accountability, while establishing structure and routine.
- Maintain open and honest communication so that expectations are made clear and understood.
- Continue to learn about addiction. Knowing the causes, triggers, and challenges of addiction can help prepare moms to support the emotional needs of their child during and after recovery.
- Supporting an Adult Child (18 and Over): Having an adult child who is battling an addiction brings with it several different challenges. For one, an adult has autonomy over themselves, making it impossible to “force” someone into recovery. Mothers of adult children with addiction must balance respect for their adult child’s autonomy while encouraging them to heal. Here are some tips on how to go about this:
- Research or offer to help research recovery options and lovingly encourage the child to get professional treatment. Offer to be with them every step of the way, attending family sessions, and providing transport if they need it.
- Avoid enabling behaviors such as giving money, housing, or bailing them out of trouble. By setting firm limits, moms can lovingly take action by tying all of their support to positive actions geared towards recovery.
- Maintain consistent communication with the child, even when it’s hard. If or when relapse happens, let the child know that your love for them and belief in their recovery have not changed. Being consistent in your adult child’s life affirms your love for them and provides a trusting, stable relationship.
A mother’s love in action means advocating for professional care, being a steady presence, ensuring the child feels supported rather than controlled, and, for adult kids, respecting their independence.
As a child begins their recovery journey, moms need to remember that their well-being matters too.
Practicing Self-Care for Moms Supporting a Child in Recovery
Loving and supporting a person through an addiction and recovery is an emotionally draining experience. For moms, there’s not much that’s more physically and emotionally draining than fighting for a child in the grips of addiction. To stay strong and be a practical support for the child, a mom must protect her own mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Use the following guide to ensure your cup is full enough to pour into your child’s:
- Get support for yourself. Whether it’s through a Salt Lake City Al-Anon group or professional help from a counselor, moms need to be able to share their experiences and learn effective coping strategies.
- Schedule time throughout the week for self-care activities. Whether it’s a yoga class at a local studio or a hike in the Big Cottonwood Canyon, all moms need to take the time to participate in activities that recharge their spirit. Even 10 minutes a day of self-care is beneficial; it does not need to be a time-consuming activity.
- Address any negative feelings like guilt or shame. Maybe that means meeting with your spiritual leader, engaging in prayer, or hiring a professional counselor. No matter how a mom goes about it, it is vital to recognize that addiction is not her fault.
- Setting healthy boundaries can protect a mom’s mental health. Saying no to demands that enable addiction can prevent the drain on a mother’s emotional state and reduce feelings of guilt.
Addiction is a disease. By mothers recognizing that they didn’t cause the addiction and caring for themselves, moms can model resilience and strength for their child and maintain the energy to support their recovery. With love, guidance, and stability, moms can help provide the foundation their child needs to heal.
Love in Action Leads to Healing
No two stories are the same, and the road to recovery is never a straight path. In every recovery story, there will be moments of progress and setbacks. But with love, patience, and persistence, a mother’s action can be a powerful force in their child’s recovery. With a deeper understanding of addiction and the ability to recognize the signs of it, mothers can lovingly guide their minor or adult children towards professional addiction treatment. Here in Salt Lake City and across the country, resources are available to help both parents and children beat addiction and find hope again. Through therapy, involvement, and compassionate self-care, moms can be a steady light in their child’s addiction recovery. Healing takes time, but with love in action, it is possible.
